Hiii. I'm sitting here listening to showtunes, wondering what this week will hold. I need to apply to college, but let's face it, I'm terrified. I tried three different schools already and none of them "were right" (at the time, anyway). What if I talk this up so much, tell everyone how great it is that I've finally figured out what I'm going to do with my life, and then... I don't get into nursing school? Or what if I get in, start going, and then immediately hit the same wall I've hit three times already, the feeling of "this just isn't for me." I know one thing, and that's that I can't work in food service for the rest of my life. Something has to change, and in order for that change to occur I have to get off my behind and get a degree. Is it just sheer laziness that's kept me from that point so far? Laziness, cowardice, lying to myself. It's probably one or all of those.
Well. I'm going to Haiti in 16 days. I'm going to do as much nursing type things as I can while I'm there, and assuming I still don't lose my control and pass out or throw up, I'm going to consider it a sign that that's what I should be doing. I should probably fill out an application, or at least get my transcripts ready to go before then. I could totally see myself just putting it off until I miss a date, and then just use that as an excuse for putting it off another semester. One thing that I am excited for about going back to school... is that I will once again be in a place where it's not horribly intimidating to audition for a show. I want to be on stage again. It's been waaay too long, especially considering that it used to be what I thought I was going to do with my life. Soon, I'll try it again.
No comments:
Post a Comment